Back from hiatus?

[ 1:59am ]
So I got way too high earlier and took a dat nap at 4pm so now I am wide awake and maybe slightly manic (I'm not telling u >:))
Drafting out what to type for my hiatus notice.
[ 2:18am ]
I've been mostly just scrolling pintrest for cool ideas of things to do and writing them down. I have a lot of hobbies that I am interested in; but unfortunately hobbies cost money and energy.
Like after chores most of the time I am done for the day I wish I could just end it there and sleep. I don't have the energy to chase after hobbies or put work into anything but whatever the bare minimum is that I have to do that day.
But if we pretend it is one of the 2 days per month that I am creative or full of energy at a time where I have nothing else to do; here are some of my ideas:
- Make a birthday letter to my brother
- Get a takle box & start filling it with different bandaid patterns, 5-10 of each design. Every time you restock bandaids, put some in. Only use the new bandaids foe yourself, and eventually have a really cool bandaid collection for when anyone gets hurt. Put one from each collection in your travel first aid kit, so you can fix up on the go.
- Order a SD card to USB read/write adapter to put more games on 3ds; and start a list of games on your to play list. But figure out where to get games first bc rip emuparadice (idk if i spelt it wrong)
- Add new sections to blog: to do list of all tasks by category (as well as hobby tasks), goals for the rest of the year, goals for who you want to be and what life to live,
[ 9:21am ]
My phone died as I was writing that lol.
Played some Nintendogs after that until i got sleepy.
This morning has been good, getting stuff done. I've been having tost every morning now that we have an air fryer and its great. My 1 true love bread.
Am a bit sad to have messed up my streak journaling and all of that, but I can always just start again like this. Telling myself it isn't ruined.
Im also pretty bummed about getting on a blacklist, I can't even get metadata for most torrents. I don't have the money for a seedbox either and since Mullvad decided to be a dick and remove port forwarding my speeds are too low.
And then there aren't any good vpns that have port forwarding now, on top of seedboxes being hard to set up + cost more than I can afford. It's like my pirate ship is broken beyond repair. I might have to retire the pirate ways and become a streamingfag for anime.
[ 10:47am ]
Already I am too tired to do anything else...
I just ran the vaccum arround the house. Didnt even mop or sweep; its close to the same level of dirtiness. But apparently that is enough for me to get so tired that I feel like I need to sleep.
I wish I could do all the things I want and have the energy for it.
[ 12:32pm ]
Finished the card to my brother, I really like the way it turned out. I want to start writing letters more often and hopefully make some pen palls. I've tried for the last couple years but to no avail. Might ask some of my online friends for their addresses in a non doxxing way to send letters and goodies and such.
My brother and I are 20 years apart, so as I turn 20 he is turning 40. It's pretty crazy to me. I'm looking forward to seeing him again next time I go down to my parent's.
Bf is sleepy but now that I had coffee to stop me from being sleepy I can't sleepy with him... the world is cruel
[ 2:11pm ]
Working on the bike now. It's going surprisingly smooth; there are a few things that I am missing tools for and will have to ask Tristin about getting. But other than that I should be able to do everything else. Hopefully will be rideable by my bday.
[ 2:36pm ]
I wish this bicycle was a living thing so I could see it bleed. I have only rarely ever felt such malice towards an individual. I wish I could slowly cut into each part of it without killing it and then leave it in a room alone to bleed out. I wish I could scrape the paint from its skin.
[ 4:06pm ]
The stray cat that lives in the rocks nearby has a new name: Tobby "Tomcat" Tabby. It must be said really fast like tobbytomtabby.
Just smoked, I'm really hungry and dizzy but dont have any food. idk what to even do but just wait for time to pass.